Entries Tagged 'Chris' ↓
February 11th, 2007 — Chris
this old guy on the metro was equipped with all the old guy gear: grandfather smoking jacket, white beard, cane, fuckin bullshit orthopedic shoes. He also had all the spanish characteristics: a long stare, terrible smoker’s cough, quick and slurred speech, and absolutely no desire to give a shit about anything. He met the criteria for two major demographics in spain. Except one thing left me, and im guessing half the metro, sratching their heads. His fuckin Deftones baseball hat.
Now i know spanish people dont give a shit about anything, ie, driving/parking, food, workhours, haircuts, sleeping, dressing and dancing heterosexually, but this is ridiculous. Right when i stepped on the metro and evaluated this fuck i took off my headphones to listen if he had any english in his vocabulary. It’s amazing. I had suspected this back in the states but it’s now confirmed: The Deftones transcend age and culture.
D’Errico
February 8th, 2007 — Chris
about 3 or 4 months ago i was at a bar with my gay coworker. we were shooting the shit, and he was really coming on to me so i asked him if he wanted to go back to his place and play chess. he continued playing cat and mouse but eventually agreed to let me stay over for the night, so i went to the bathroom to buy a condom because the last time we fucked i got a cock rug burn. but when i got out of the bathroom he had left.
i saw him last night, and he looked cute and all, but he was so rude. i dont get it; he didnt say one word to me and kept yelling at some fat old bitch that he was tryin to bone.
-Chewy
December 11th, 2006 — Chris
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chris
December 6th, 2006 — Chris
person 1: it’s 911 make a wish
person 2: came true 5 yrs ago
-chewy
December 5th, 2006 — Chris
Sometimes (and more recently than not), jokes are so good i lose my shit.
more specifically, the jokes on this site provoke so many emotions; i am happy that i am part of a blog of such caliber yet embarrassed to be so dependent on the words and ideals transcribed through this intangible thing. the result is a blank face. but don’t worry, i get it. and i feel it, hard. in me.
sometimes im just blinded by the bright glimmer of comic gold, here on gynamoaf.
Chewbacca
November 12th, 2006 — Chris
i punched a wall so hard i broke two hand bones which then dislocated over my wrist bones. the hand bones chipped the wrist bones when they dislocated.
chewy
October 29th, 2006 — Chris
nike lebron james swimming pool commercial
chewy
October 27th, 2006 — Chris
went to a costume party last night dressed as steve zissou. more people thought i was a lumberjack or wheres waldo than team zissou. fuck em.
chewy
October 25th, 2006 — Chris
“come on little guy, come on little guy, come on little guy, come on little guy”
“do you have any blank cds”
“it looks like a big sharpie”
“Do any of you guys know who Jason Pinckney is? Yeah, Me Neither”
“its so fluffy i wanna run my nose through it”
“what’s with the turtleneck…i thought jews were circumsized?”
“still waters run deep”
CHEWY
October 25th, 2006 — Chris
when i write my full name i think chris-top-her. not christopher. if i didnt know how to spell top or her i would have no idea how to spell my name